The Single Life—Devoted to the Lord in Body and Spirit

My dear brothers and sisters in Christ,

     Tuesday is a big holiday. Can you tell me what it is? That’s right—Valentine’s Day. The candy and cards have been in the stores since December 26^th. Flower stores offer specials on dozens of roses. Restaurants promote a unique “Dinner for Two”. Maybe it’s your favorite holiday. But let’s be honest, not everyone loves Valentine’s Day. For every person who loves Valentine’s Day, you can probably find another person who equally despises the day. For some people, Valentine’s Day is just one more reminder that they are single, and that they are alone.

     Couples will get their special day on Tuesday. Today is a special day for everyone who is single. Today is your day to celebrate God’s gift of being single. That’s right, I called it a gift. Despite the pressure you might feel to find your soul mate, despite any loneliness you might be experiencing, God actually calls your position in life a gift. And that is exactly why today’s message is for everyone. Children, single adults, widows, and widowers, this message is addressed specifically for your situation in life. But if you’re married or engaged, it’s also for you. The way we speak and act towards single people can have a profound impact on the way they view both their position in life, and ours.

     Let’s look at our text once again. In these words from 1 Corinthians, which of the two—single or married—does it sound better? The single life! Hollywood and the entertainment industry celebrate it. In fact, they often portray married life as being dull and boring while the single life is alive and exciting. You have no commitments or obligations to tie you down. Being single gives you the freedom to sleep around without any kind of commitment. Being single means you can think about yourself and focus on your needs without having to worry about a spouse or children.

     This is not what the Apostle Paul had in mind when he talked about God’s gift of being single. Neither the married life nor the single life is about selfishly fulfilling our desires. What did Paul call the main aim of a single man or woman? Look at verse 32 and verse 34. To be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit. It is all about the priorities we set!

     We can see that devotion to the Lord in our readings for today. Look back at the Old Testament reading. “Now Joseph was well-built and handsome, and after a while his master’s wife took notice of Joseph and said, ‘Come to bed with me!’ But he refused. ‘…No one is greater in this house than I am. My master has withheld nothing from me except you, because you are his wife. How then could I do such a wicked thing and sin against God?’” (Genesis 39:6–9). How does the Bible describe Joseph? He is well-built and handsome. Joseph was a young man surrounded by all kinds of “today” temptations. Single and tempted!

     Look at the gospel reading for today: “There was also a prophetess, Anna, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was very old; she had lived with her husband seven years after her marriage, and then was a widow until she was eighty-four. She never left the temple but worshiped night and day, fasting and praying” (Luke 2:36–37). How does the Bible describe Anna? 84 years old, a widow for much of her life. She had been married, but was now single and waiting for the Lord to take her to heaven. While she waited, she spent her time in the temple worshiping, fasting, and praying.

     We can’t forget about the Apostle Paul, the man who wrote the words of 1 Corinthians 7. He had something in common with Joseph and Anna. He was also single. Paul was a single, middle-aged missionary. He never married, but dedicated all of his time and energy to sharing the gospel. With each of these believers, marital status was not number one on their list of priorities. Did all three follow Paul’s advice to “be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit”? Yes! Joseph ran from temptation rather than sin against God. Anna and Paul dedicated their lives to the Lord and his Word. All three responded to God’s goodness with single-minded devotion to the Lord in body and in spirit.

     When we are devoted to the Lord, he promises to bless us. One of my friends told me a story about his worst Valentine’s Day ever. He was head over heels for this girl. That Valentine’s Day, the girl got roses, but they weren’t from him. He was devastated, but a few years later, that girl became his wife! He shared that story with me as a reminder of one of God’s blessings for single people; patience. In faithful prayer and quiet confidence, he had to put himself into God’s hands, knowing that God’s will for his life is always best. For those of you who are single and wonder what God’s plan is, find God’s patience. Wait for the Lord to carry out his plan. Remember what we heard last week—we can be confident in our Father’s love for us. Trust that he knows exactly what we need in life. And even more importantly, he knows what it takes to get us into eternal life. God’s heart is totally devoted to you and me.

     God offers a second gift to singles; God gives you the opportunity to devote 100% of your attention to serving Him and others. The Apostle Paul says that a single person may live with “undivided devotion to the Lord” (vs. 35). The Greek word he uses there is the same word that occurs in the account of Mary and Martha. Remember how Martha was distracted by the preparations—the cooking and the cleaning? Mary, on the other hand, sat at Jesus’ feet listening with undivided attention. Martha chose a good thing—to take care of Jesus. Mary chose the one thing she needed the most: to sit quietly and meditate on every one of Jesus’ words. Jesus encourages you to be like Mary. Before pursuing a spouse, pursue Jesus and his Word. Make his Word your joy and delight. Find comfort in his promise to never leave nor forsake you. Enjoy his daily presence in your life.

     God gives a third blessing to singles: the opportunity to build many meaningful relationships. Psychologists have sometimes used the metaphor of Lego building blocks to describe people. A Lego piece isn’t meant to be alone. Legos come in sets; they’re meant to be connected to other Legos. But like a Lego, there are only so many meaningful connections or relationships that we can have. A family of 5, together with extended family, aunts, uncles, and grandparents might be a complete “Lego” set in and of themselves. There might be little to no room for new pieces to get added in. A single Lego may have more flexibility to establish new and meaningful connections. Let me give you a more concrete example.

     One of my family’s dearest friends is a widow named Evelyn. She lost her husband after they had been married for just three years. When he died, they had three children, and the youngest was just a few months old. Evelyn said, “I could have just felt sorry for myself and I could have given up.” She didn’t. She found a job as a nurse, raised her children, and made connections wherever she went. We met Evelyn at the congregation I served in Houston. One of the first things she did was offer to help Kay watch a 3 year old and twin infants during church, and she did. She held babies, wiped noses and tears, read books, and pointed little eyes and hearts to Jesus. She didn’t limit those connections to the pew on Sunday morning. She was also one of the best evangelists I’ve ever met. She would talk to people about Jesus at her exercise class, at the store, at the ball game, on calls with me and others at the church. She volunteered to sit in the waiting room at the hospital. She wanted to pray with people waiting for loved ones who were in surgery, and told them about Jesus’ love for them whenever she had the chance.

     When you take a bunch of Lego blocks and connect them, you can make some pretty amazing things. What happens when someone who is single begins to make new and meaningful connections? In Houston, it seemed that everyone knew our friend Evelyn. She had made so many connections in her desire to share Jesus. The same is true for you. Look for ways to build beautiful relationships right here at Salem. Look for the visitor who needs some attention. The mom in the pew with 3 children can greet that visitor for a moment, but then she’s off corralling little people. You can make a meaningful connection with that visitor by sharing yourself and your time! You can build relationships by getting involved with Sunday School or the Pioneer programs. As you lead little ones to know Jesus better, your faith will grow and deepen because of the time you spend studying his Word and preparing for those events. You can make connections by staying after church and talking to just one person before you leave.

     These are just a few ways in which single Christians can use their time and energy to build new bridges and connections with each other and with Christ. There are many other singles we could point to as examples from the Bible. We could speak of Elijah and Elisha, or Jeremiah and Lydia. Don’t forget about Jesus. He lived in perfect devotion to his Father in body and spirit. He also made a connection with us possible by his death and resurrection. He is connected to us forever!

     I’d like to offer a word of encouragement to the married couples of the church and also to parents of young adults who are single. We want to see our single friends and children happy. We regularly pray that they find a good, faithful Christian spouse. There’s nothing wrong with that. Marriage is a beautiful thing that we’ll talk about next week. Remember that God also imparts amazing gifts to singles. Let’s avoid comments that make it sound like as if there’s something wrong with being single or comments that make it seem like you can only be happy if you are married. Moms, when someone offers to help with your children during church or Bible study, it’s okay to make that connection and say, “Yes!” You and your children will benefit from that relationship. Look for opportunities to include those who are single in our conversations, and make those “Lego” connections with them. You’ll find that together, fellow believers can build beautiful relationships.

     Whether single or married, let’s rejoice that God has brought us into an eternal friendship with him. Let’s seek to share that friendship with others. Let’s thank God for the unique gifts that he gives to us no matter what our status in life may be. And “may the Lord make your love increase and overflow for each other… may he strengthen your hearts so that you will be blameless and holy in the presence of our God and Father when our Lord Jesus comes with all his holy ones.” (1 Thessalonians 3:12-13) Amen.